I wonder how you are feeling as you start this new year? In all honesty, I could have done with an extra week of holiday. I'm not ready for the New Year vibe right now. So on my first day of work I'm taking it easy, listening to my body and daring to dip just a toe into the year ahead. As I navigate this season, I thought I'd share a couple of the tools I'll be using to gain clarity and to prioritise the actions I take in 2023.
Firstly, I'm starting the year from a place of gratitude for all the experiences and achievements of 2022. This is not toxic positivity, 2022 was mixed as I am sure it was for everyone, but I'm choosing to take away the good bits and the learning. Gratitude when practised regularly can help your brain tune into the positives, the progress and the present which helps us move forward rather than being stuck in overwhelm or discontentment. Secondly, I'm treating myself with compassion and looking at things I want more of this year. Often when we make New Years resolutions we can be be harsh or judgemental with ourselves as we look at what is wrong and needs 'fixing'. Instead I'm celebrating all I am and looking with a longer term view of what I want to be more of in 2023, some of those healthier habits might play a part but from a place of self compassion and sufficiency rather than judgement.
So here are the tools I'm using, they are grounded in neuroscience and help us rewire the brain to focus on the things we want more of in 2023, rather than the challenges.
Word for the year: This year I tried one of those word searches where you spot a word and that's your word for the year at other times I've scanned lists waiting for something to resonate. I love a tool like this, not for any of it's 'magical powers' of prediction but for inspiration, provoking thoughts and feelings. This year, I quickly saw four words and the first three had instant meaning and were things I'd thought through but the fourth I instantly dismissed. It was a word I thought had no relevance to me, but it kept coming to mind and I have continued to play with it and get curious. Firstly, I explored the resistance and what it felt like and where it showed up in my body. Why had I dismissed it so quickly and what meaning had I placed on the word? I had the word in a particular context but when I changed the context, I changed it's meaning too. In fact, this word has become a key marker for success in 2023. Why not play around with emotions or values words. What do you want more of this year? Notice your reactions to different words and go with your gut reaction. Try making it your log on password or add it as your screen saver. How can you keep your brain focussed on the word, your daily actions in line with it and feel more of it in 2023?
Vision boarding: Now I get that this might be a bit 'woo woo' for some or out of your comfort zone where as others might lap up the opportunity to get creative and do a project. Personally, I love a bit of cutting and sticking but if that's not your thing there are apps to explore or Canva offers the function. When we create a vision board we are visualising what we want 2023 to be like. We are creating clear images that matter, they evoke a feeling and our brain lights up to this. It value tags these images and every time we see these images, every time we act in alignment to the the version of ourselves we want to be in 2023, it strengthens that connection. Our brains are fabulously pliable and are able to make new connections quickly and by creating a visual reminder we strengthen that connection and help keep the brain alert and focussed on where we want to be by the end of 2023.
"Emotions play a crucial role in goal setting. Research has shown that when we connect our goals to our values and attach them to emotional outcomes, we’re more motivated to succeed and feel positive about it in the process "(Austenfeld, Paolo, & Stanton 2006). Why not sit down with a cup of tea a few magazines and start tuning into which images you are drawn to and the emotions they are evoking. Snap picture whilst you are out and about walking or scroll through your photostream. Allow yourself time to daydream and start creating the life you want to live in 2023. "Both visualisation and meditation have been proven to have a wonderful impact on our overall mood and sense of happiness and fulfilment" (Meevissen, Peters, & Alberts, 2011, Peters, Flink, Boersma, & Linton, 2010). Notice the emotions that surface as you build your 2023 vision.
These first two tools help us to gain clarity but they also provide a decision making filter. Does having the difficult conversation move me closer to the person I want to be in 2023 or take me further away? When looking at my diary do these engagements help me move forward to the goal or distract my focus? When making decisions ask yourself 'does this fit with what i want more of in 2023 or is it acting in opposition?' Getting clear on how you want to be in 2023 can help you prioritise and hold your boundaries.
I wonder, what will you be saying no to?
What do you need to release that no longer serves you in 2023?
Journalling: My clients often want to work with a coach to achieve a specific outcome but along the way most also recognise a side effect of coaching, increased self awareness! During sessions I often reflect back what a client is saying or ask them to notice how they felt when they said something.
Journalling is a little like that. It offers us the chance to put our thoughts onto paper and to then inspect them, to challenge them and the opportunity to change them. Below I offer you some journal prompts to explore.
How do you need to be in 2023?
What do you need to let go of?
What do you need to believe about yourself?
What help do you need?
How will you know when you have achieved it?
What will this give you that you don't already have?
What is the difference between my reality and where I want to be?
What will keep you motivated as you take these steps?
Who do you have on your 'team' to support you?
What will happen if I don't take these steps?
How motivated are you to achieve it?
All of these tools would be great to use as a family or class too.
What feeling would you like our family to experience more of in 2023?
What value would you like our class to show more of in 2023? What actions might you take?
Create a class or family vision board, add journalling to your night time routine or pose one of the journalling prompt as a discussion starter at the beginning of the school day.
What tool might you like to try as you dip your toe into 2023?
I'd love to connect with you on social media and hear what you'll be exploring in 2023. If you'd like to find out how coaching can support you with taking action during 2023 then I'd happily spend 30 minutes getting to know you on a free discovery call.
Jo@theearlyyearscoach.com
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